You made me cry and you don't even care
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018