Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
