He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
