Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize