I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
