will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
YAS. BRING CRAB.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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