i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize