either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize