OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Randomize