all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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