just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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