The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
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He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
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Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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