I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
