I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
