So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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