yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
