Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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