you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
