Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
i've created a new STD.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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