I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
