She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
