Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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