So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
she pinky promised me she was 18
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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