the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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