I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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