I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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