ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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