Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
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i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
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Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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