wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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