my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize