To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
