can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I need to align my fucking chakras
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize