I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
