i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
