none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
