I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Randomize
