Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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