Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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