im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize