I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
