Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
If that was your dad, he is hot
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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