worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
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the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
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Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
How does it feel to date your dad?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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