do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize