started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize