Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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