I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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