Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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