i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
