I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
