somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
